24Oct2011Eve

I went to Dates 0nline because while it is not poetry, it is clear where I am in the process of the day.

Why things take so long? This must be an assignment of confusion any one speaking to me during the day. I am so much slower in my world. This evening, I watched the baseball game. During that time, that is all who I was. I am not much of a multi-task world at this point.

I am fortunate that I have my beau-dad. He has seen my growing more acurately than anyone. He seems to let me take so much time at the stores that he never seems annoyed. He just watched from a distance. My mom seemed confused when we got back from the store. It took 90 minites. If it is something at the house, I am OK. But any place where there is outside places, if there is a new walk, I am slow. I follow the sidewalks, or I watch the paths, the points in the floors. There is almost always a line, some where. Today was the most independent I was in the market I have been. For over 40 minutes he waited for me out side. Or at lease hid from me in the story to ensure I was OK.

He is the most patience with me than anyone. He does not read when I type, or can post. He just watches out for me. He gentle makes sure I am working the right way to re-walk. I have fewer ways to see. This he knows. And I am protected and being encouraged.

Apple Hill

Erin says she is too tired to post …. her day began with an early phone call to Steve suggesting that he and the boys pick her up and that they go to Apple Hill east of Placerville.  It is the season where many apple ranches are open with apple items for sale.  Steve and the kids came into our house and as they were leaving, Lemon calmly said, “Goodbye, Mom”.  He had not realized that Erin was going with them.

Their visit there was a short one because Paco had to be back in Davis for a birthday party.  However, Erin did manage to come home with a box of assorted apples, 2 pies (one for Brandon and family), apple cider,and doughnuts. It is too early in the season for her favorite apple, Arkansas Black, so she is already planning another trip back to Apple Hill.

Barbara

22Oct2011b

I think I already, but just in case:

22Oct2011

I have in a fog whole day. I am unsure what kicked this day. I was either with my sister or Clark or Mom. I will have to take the oddity as there being an attack in my war. And they are mad.

 

Steven is amazing and incredible. Another day.

 

Maybe I will be more normal. This is actually  one fogginess.

 

More tomorrow!

21Oct2011

I am trying to use more of the new system. So not there. I need to see if I can type more!

But mainly we had a good day. I’ll give it a better written later note.

21Oct2011

 

 

20Oct2011

 

 

I had over wore my body a bit too much. I know I have to build, but right now, I am just sooooo sleepy. As always!

 

My cousins admit they are tired as well. I think every one is juggling happy and it is a true generation of heart.

 

So there is more info about what my love is so strong and balancing every thing. He is getting help; People are kind and giving.

 

I am trying to get trough all the paper stuff from the last 6 months, but I am so slow.

 

Hopefully I write more tomorrow!

19Oct2011

I am so sleepy. My body seems to be tired. Everything needs sleep.

Why: This Was Taken 18 Mos Ago

Still think they inspire ever chance to survive.

Fortunate, Planning Death

This one may seem sad. Not the point. I think having family and friends be honest is incredible. Yesterday finished a start for me. If I go, the cousins promised to come and drink. We must celebrate every day what we have and simply be grateful.

 

I am not super editing this one. So take it with a huge grain of salt.

 

Not sure how far I will get on the site tonight, but I owe a lot. Quite a lot.

As one of the younger child, between the 20 grandchildren of my grandmothers…the 70s are, for me, the beginning of my world. As they, we, grew, some eras we had a lot in common, some we did.  As adults we have sent family notices, announces, and always a place sleep.

Tom and Betsy  always where here the summers, visiting the cousins and they are just a few years just at the door. This was not for the weddings or the older kids to get married at we were in our tees. Tom, and his love D, came out to simply help.  I think it is rare, in life, what we can do for people. They arrived last year and helped every minute.

 

I’ll start with the most dramatic…well, it should have been…I went and bought where to be buried. There is a wonderful in Davis and I knew how much I loved having a place to send my children. I know this sounds odd to any non-family soul, but visiting the past gives me reminds what I have had in my life. I know my grandfather and grandmothers are, uncle Tim, great father in northern California. This time, Davis was just a clear place to be. I am likely to be in a few years, in the ground. The fear is not what I feel. I want to stay alive and kiss my husband more and see everything more living. I am unsure what to call my lack of fearsome. I guess because I love the idea of my family, my friends, celebrate the life I have. I am so fortunate.

With my cousin and his love, we went to the site to be buried with me and helped be finish the paper worl. And I swear, with the understanding of celebration, they seemed to understand. And while there are tears and sad times, at least we see the incredible. We understood celebration.